Colbert's Final 10 Months Gonna Make Trump's Swollen Cankles Holler, We Reckon
One of the most disconcerting things of this second era of “Hitler: Dumber, Stupider, Ew Gross Look At His Cankles” has been the way so many institutions have caved so preemptively it’s hard to even call it “obeying in advance.” Something in that phrase suggests a kind of nobility or good intentions that were unfortunately sidelined, unprepared for the onslaught, that didn’t steel themselves, that cowered in fear when faced with tyranny. Watching tech bros line up to swallow Donald Trump’s microdick at the inauguration, watching media companies reply to Trump’s demands with anything less than a throaty “fuck off,” there’s been no nobility or dignity in that. They look like they’re mighty fine with the arrangement.
These stupid lawsuits any attorney who’s barely out of law school could fight on day one, and they’re paying settlements because George Stephanopoulos hurt Donald Trump’s feelings by correctly describing what happened in the Trump/E. Jean Carroll rape civil lawsuit? Firing Terry Moran because he correctly described the desolate cavern of dead animal carcasses and racist shame fantasies that make up Stephen Miller’s soul?
Fuck off. It’s not “obeying in advance” if licking fascist ass is your kink.
And now Stephen Colbert, fired by all reasonable appearances for correctly saying that CBS’s parent company Paramount had just agreed to pay a $16 million bribe to settle Trump’s loathsomely stupid lawsuit over the “60 Minutes” Kamala Harris interview that stole the election from Trump — in his heart, if not in reality, since he actually won that election we guess — by making her look too good. Or, you know, just in general, because he hurts Emperor Microdickus’s feelings.
Oh, we know, we know, we know, those aren’t the officially stated reason Colbert was fired, but nobody believes the officially stated reason, so we’re all out here being forced to use the deductive reasoning God gave us.
https://www.wonkette.com/p/colberts-final-10-months-gonna-make