'School Group Visiting Mar-a-Lago Finds Epstein List in Bathroom'

[sop]

PALM BEACH (The Borowitz Report)—In a stunning development, a group of fifth graders on a school trip to Mar-a-Lago stumbled upon the Epstein list in one of the club’s public bathrooms, the group’s teacher confirmed on Monday.

“The kids were really surprised to find the list,” said Carol Foyler, who traveled with her summer school students from Daytona Beach. “They wondered how it made it all the way from Pam Bondi’s desk.”

Liam Dorrinson, 11, said that he and his classmates plan to publish the Epstein list in their school’s newspaper, and dismissed concerns that Donald Trump might sue them.

“I wouldn’t do that if I was him,” the fifth grader said. “We also found his taxes.”

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/school-group-visiting-mar-a-lago?publication_id=2337656&utm_campaign=email-post-title&r=r38w4&utm_medium=email

[Omnipresent]

1. Sounds like something read in the 'Onion'.

[dhol82]

2. It's from Borowitz

[doc03]

3. I saw a list on Facebook yesterday. It listed several underage girls and

boys Trump had sex with and how much he paid their parents to keep it quiet. I assume it is not true but
with Trump it does seem entirely possible.