More Mystery At Zorro Ranch! -- Marcie Jones - Wonkette

[erronis]

https://www.wonkette.com/p/more-mystery-at-zorro-ranch

Last Thursday, before and after we saged our laptop, we told you about how on Monday officials in New Mexico had searched the property formerly known as Epstein's Zorro ranch, a spooky, blustery parcel on a remote high desert plateau between Santa Fe and Albuquerque, after an anonymous email tip from 2019 claimed that two girls were buried there. But that tip, as with most others, was never investigated, and the ranch was never searched, in spite of multiple reports that children had been raped there.

And shit gets so much weirder, y'all. The man who quietly bought that land in 2023 was former Republican Texas state Senator, Don Blaine Huffines:


... who immediately set to secretly digging the property up with backhoes, no permits requested. Once reporters found out, Huffines said his plan all along had been to make the place a Christian retreat, but the county says he has not requested nor filled out any paperwork for either permits or to operate such a thing, either. And Huffines is not just some rich entitled sack of shit who might be able to pretend that he didn't know any better; before he was a state Senator he was a career real estate developer. Who is now running to be the Comptroller of Texas! Huffines knows full well how building permits work, and wants to make keeping tabs on Texas's financial paperwork his entire job. But either he figured he was a special exception to getting his digging shut down, as it now has, and, or, Some People Are Wondering if he thought the risk of immediately digging up the place was worth it because there's some evidence on that ranch he wants to try and hide for one or more of his GOP pals. Who can say!

It seems unlikely any evidence would be left after so much time, or able to be located in the ranch's vast 7,600-acre expanse, especially after Epstein's Belarusian dentist girlfriend had ample time to clean it up before it was seized to pay Epstein's debts, but who knows.

And Don Huffines' Trump connection is HMMM. Both he and his twin brother Phillip are OG Tea Partiers cum bigtime Texas MAGA, GOP and Trump donors. Yes, of course Don has a twin brother in this wacked-out hallucinatory Nancy Drew hellscape we're all now forced to inhabit.

Don Huffines was so MAGA that in the Texas senate, along with the usual MAGA crap, he wrote a bill to end vehicle safety inspections. Naturally, another hobbyhorse of his attacking the Texas Department of Child and Family Services for being too woke, huh! Those MAGA Republicans sure do hate anything that tries to rescue children from abuse with the heat of a thousand suns. And eventually Huffines got too nuts for even Texas, in 2018 voters in his district booted him in favor of a Democratic candidate for the first time in decades.

. . .

[bluestarone]

1. Gotta find out who opersated those backhoes

Everyone of them!!

[ColoringFool]

2. Some Call It "Conspiracy Theory"; Others Call It "Connections."

Always, the question is what to believe?

[erronis]

3. I'm going with "friends who know friends" who can get things done.

And "keep it quiet"

[wnylib]

4. I don't believe that it's impossible to find evidence

Last edited Sat Mar 14, 2026, 05:09 PM - Edit history (1)

at Zorro ranch of dead bodies. It would take a lot of forensic work, but it could be done with the right equipment.

Archeologists use flights over regions to locate underground holes, tunnels, and densities under the surface that differ from the surroundings. This tells them where to start excavations.

Once suspicious areas were located dogs could be brought in to help.

If bones are found, forensic anthropologists can examine them for the age and gender of the person and how long ago the bones were put there. A good forensic bone specialist can learn a lot from bones about the person, sometimes even how the person died.

Teeth can give clues to the ID of the deceased.

Records of missing person reports can narrow down which ones fit the forensic description of the remains that are found.

What is the soil like where the ranch is? Is it dry and sandy? How well would the soil preserve remains?

Maybe the people who buried the remains unknowingly left some evidence of themselves in the graves.

A haphazard investigation might turn up nothing, but a thorough forensic investigation with the right equipment and experts might turn up more than people expect.

[LiberalArkie]

6. Supposedly the Ranch also had incinerators on site

[Joinfortmill]

8. Jeezus. Horrific beyond words. Hard to wrap your mind around.

[wnylib]

12. Is that speculation or confirmed fact?

There were tips given to police or FBI that 2 girls' bodies were buried on the ranch and that infants were killed there.

If they had been incinerated, why bother burying the ashes? Just toss them out to blow away.

[LiberalArkie]

17. From Claude:

Yes, there have been serious allegations about an incinerator at Epstein's Zorro Ranch. Here's what's known:

The allegations: A retired New Mexico State Police officer who had patrolled the area for 15 years told the FBI he was concerned about a suspicious barn Epstein had built, noting it had a chimney and a "sally port" — a secure entry with multiple doors. He believed it could potentially conceal an incinerator. EBSCO

FBI inaction: This warning, along with an anonymous email alleging buried bodies, was forwarded to the FBI and included in the January 2026 document release — but the FBI took no known investigative action at the time. Wikipedia

Recent search: On March 10, 2026, the New Mexico Department of Justice, New Mexico State Police, and Sandoval County Sheriff's Office conducted the first-ever law enforcement search of the former Zorro Ranch — something the FBI is not known to have ever done. Wikipedia

It's important to note that as of now, no incinerator has been confirmed — it remains an allegation from a 2019 tip. The investigation is still very much ongoing.

[OMGWTF]

7. Ivana's grave needs looking at too.

[AZ8theist]

15. Very good points.

[BlueKota]

18. I wonder if there were bones, if they were already

removed by this Magat? I hope not. Something has to bring these sickos down.

[MLWR]

5. There is just something about turning

the quintessential pedophile's rape-and-torture ranch into a christian retreat. I can't put my finger on it, but it has to do with being the ultimate irony.

[Joinfortmill]

9. No shit, right?

[eppur_se_muova]

11. More like a variation on a theme.

A place to hold people who don't want to be there. Only "misbehaving" kids will be sent by their parents. Try reading "Jesus Land" to see how that works out.

[AZ8theist]

16. It's not difficult to connect the dots.

Christian missionaries have been abusing children for centuries. One just needs to look at what was done to the native population of the West to understand this mindset.

[erronis]

19. And incineration is one of that religion's favorite methonds of coercion, torture, and erasure.

[NBachers]

10. Imagine the worst, and it's always worse than that.

[Uncle Joe]

13. Kicked and recommended

Thanks for the thread erronis

[Qutzupalotl]

14. We can't say Huffines "knows where the bodies are buried,"

but it sure seems like he's trying to find out.

Not saying he has a connection to Epstein. Maybe he thinks if he does find bodies, that would give him leverage over Trump and make him the de facto most powerful person in the world.