Common Problem Need advice

[Playingmantis]

I have a problem and I suspect I am not alone. I am 81 and have a friend who I have known since third grade. He was and is a fun guy
He was always a Republican and we had our “discussions”.

Unfortunately, he has become a MAGA, first class. I rode with him one day in his car and found that he listened to Alex Jones. Years ago, it was Rush Limbaugh.

We both try to avoid discussing the state of the nation for obvious reasons.

Today, however, he sent me a text in which he compared Trump to Lincoln, in that the press hated both..
I replied “bullshit”. (You know it’s not possible to have a serious discussion with text so I was brief.) He asked why saying Trump has “closed the boarder, deported dangerous criminals and made amazing trade deals.”

I said the US was like a beautiful house with a heating problem that hired Trump for repairs and he proceeded to set fire to the house.
He disagreed and I disagreed with his disagreement. And that ended it.

I just have a hard time dealing with Trumpers and members of my family, including my sister, are the same.

How do you deal with this? Any advice? I am sure I am not alone but it’s upsetting that they just can’t see through the bullshit and lies.
(On a positive note, my niece, who used to be a Trumper hates him but some will never get the con.)

Thanks

[mountain grammy]

1. Easy, I don't talk to them

Just Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday.

They have nothing to say that interests me.

[bluestarone]

2. It's sad, but the truth is tRUMP has destroyed more families, friendships and countries more than

ANY person on earth. I'm 78 and my siblings and i are enemies.I 100% refuse to be friends with people that would vote and support HITLER. It's your decision of course, but my decision was very easy. Keep thinking of the young girls lives these worthless scumbags destroyed. Best of luck to you!

[GiqueCee]

5. Destroying families is the point...

... intractable division is his goal. He thrives on creating chaos; it both serves his malign purposes, and satisfies Putin's requirements, which protects him – for now – from defenestration.
Trump has always been consumed with malice and hatred; it defines him. It also defines those who still support him, regardless of the irrefutable proof of his treachery, misogyny, mendacity, and corruption. They'd carve their own eyes out with a rusty spoon before they'd EVER admit they were wrong. That's how weak they are. And how mean they are. They LOVE that he hurts people; he validates their bigotry toward those same people.
Trump has NO redeeming qualities whatsoever; not a single one. The motherfucker doesn't even like dogs. In fact, he ridicules people who love their pets. He's rotten to the very core of his being, right down to his fuckin' DNA. His father was a racist piece of shit, and his grandfather was a pimp. Now that is a polluted bloodline.

[NewHendoLib]

3. I avoid MAGA utterly - whether former friends, or family. They are in a cult. It's not worth the effort.

[Cirsium]

4. Similar story here

There isn't an a easy answer. I finally likened it to having a friend who became and alcoholic or a drug addict, or to an abusive spouse. MAGA = abuse. Without the abuse, there is no MAGA, and none of us should ever have to endure abuse.

This has nothing to do with political philosophies, nor with "differing opinions," nor with "always being a Republican." MAGA is a cult, and being given license to abuse others is the attraction for the cult members.

[Clouds Passing]

6. Remind him that it is now the gqp building the concentration camps on u.s. soil for u.s. prisoners of war.

[Amaryllis]

7. You might find this helpful. It has helped a lot of people both leave MAGA and deal with family/friends who are MAGA.

leavingmaga.org

Dear MAGA Americans,

I was a devoted member of MAGA nation for seven years; it made me feel I was part of something important: a movement that was trying to save American democracy.

But starting in 2021, I realized I had been mistaken. It took me a full year to finally break away. During that time, I came to understand that MAGA is sustained by a series of myths that are intended to create perpetual feelings of desperation and panic.

Succumbing to these predatory myths does not mean you are unintelligent, weak, or lack good character and morals. I have a Bachelor’s degree; have been a working professional my entire life; am a family man; and consider myself a relatively honest and intelligent person. I think the same about you.

I understand the reasons you have for supporting MAGA. And I know many of us traveled different paths to get there. I gravitated to Donald Trump because I have always been suspicious of our two-party system, and I saw him as the right man at the right time.

I have a sense that some of you have quietly left MAGA already, or are increasingly regretful, confused and scared. All of this can be doubly upsetting, since some of your sincerely-held beliefs may have alienated you from friends and family. That certainly happened to me.

It’s perfectly OK to feel this way; leaving MAGA was a tumultuous roller coaster of a process for me. It may be one of the most difficult endeavors you embark upon. In the end, it brought me an inner peace, and a newfound clarity about what is happening in our beloved country.

I founded this organization, Leaving MAGA, because I wanted to create a safe, non-judgmental community for those who leave MAGA, as well as for those who are having doubts about, or remorse over, their devotion to Trump and MAGA.

Our Leaving MAGA community will celebrate how acknowledging mistakes empowers you and America.

It’s difficult for a democracy to function well when millions are estranged from those closest to them.

You do not deserve to have your anxieties about change exploited. You deserve to know the truth. And with Leaving MAGA, you don’t have to feel you would be alone if you leave the movement.

Leaving MAGA is possible. Recognizing that we were wrong, and acting on that knowledge, makes us all more invested in democracy and in the continued work of perfecting our union.

Sincerely, and humbly yours,
Rich