Dear GOD, CNN's coverage of the Bezos wedding rocketed right past "Onanistic" into I don't know WTF

[Miles Archer]

I get it, we're supposed to care because he's a billionaire, and is spending more money than any of us will ever come close to in a couple of days, $5 million wedding ring, blah blah blah.

But I just clicked on CNN's home page and it's like some kind of unholy Hallmark Movie Channel wet dream.

He's a fuckin' bald guy with money marrying a woman who disfigured herself with botched plastic surgery.

I'm having a struggle reading any more into it than that.

[maxsolomon]

1. Champagne Wishes and Caviar Dreams!

Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. People will hate-click at the very least.

Everyone who works in Seattle's Amazonia was in the office as usual this morning. The Mercer exit off I-5 was backed up a half mile. RTO, peons!

[senseandsensibility]

2. They're absolutely desperate for ratings

but they won't get any from me. I find the whole topic boring.

[Skittles]

3. two people using each other

nothing to celebrate there

[UpInArms]

4. Personally

I find it disgusting

And will not give a click

[Miles Archer]

6. Same here, and that's the exact reason why I didn't post any content.

I have CNN, MSNBC, Yahoo, etc all lined up in the bookmarks bar of my browser. I cycle through them. And I also didn't give them a click. I described what they have on their home page but had zero interest in seeing any more than I saw.

[Deuxcents]

11. Nor will I. Gets my blood pressure up when I think of the millions who will have to do without

So that he and those like him will get tax breaks. I don’t begrudge anyone their privilege but when it’s at the expense of others, then it doesn’t settle with me.

[markie]

32. It is

Almost always “at the expense of others” 😏

[Hekate]

5. I don't even know who the bride is

Nor do I care

[snowybirdie]

7. Just think of

any woman frequenting Mar a Lago and you'll know her

[TexasBushwhacker]

10. Except she has dark hair!

But otherwise she looks like The Joker with breast implants.

[paleotn]

16. Can't these jack-o-loons afford decent plastic work?

Same with Botox Barbie. She looks like she went 5 rounds with Mike Tyson, minus the ear biting. That takes a special kind of fucked up I guess.

[dflprincess]

29. I don't understand how the doctors they see

manage to keep their licesnses. I wonder if any of them are board certified.

[Xavier Breath]

18. For her sake I hope she's more Heath Ledger than Cesar Romero.

[RubyRose]

34. More like Nickleson's version on Smilex.

[wcmagumba]

8. They'll be split up within a year or so, she better have a decent pre-nup...ha ha

Lifestyles of the Bald and Boo-tiful...

[FHRRK]

9. On a cross country flight

Caught a micro minute of the coverage while channel surfing. As bad as CNN breaking news is, Jesus on a pogo stick! Fox had a segment on something Newsom posted using a WWE meme, could only watch 5 secs, had something to do with transgender athletes. Later flipped through and they were on a Biden Auto pen rant.

[Rebl2]

12. Oh please

This is a zillion times worse than a hallmark movie

[viva la]

13. Think of the damage to the fragile Venice environment

They were going to have to limit the number of tourists. This won't help.

[Raine]

14. NAUSEATING!!! 🤢 🤮 ... nt

[AverageOldGuy]

15. I just checked CNN online

Why do trophy wives think it's necessary for them to have chests that fall out of their low-cut dresses?

[Haggard Celine]

20. It's Big Breast Energy!

It's a contest to see who can show the most without revealing the nipple. And the big hair! They look like they're emulating 80s heavy metal stars.

[John1956PA]

26. They can't hold a candle to the 1980s female rockers.

[Haggard Celine]

40. Lita Ford! I forgot all about her.

All that big hair makes them look like Satan's charismatics.

[paleotn]

22. Tools of the "trade" if you know what I mean.

The oldest trade on earth. Seriously, that's what it is. From Melanoma to this bizarre specimen. They're getting paid.

And money does weird things to people's brains. I've been married to my partner for 34 years. We enjoy each other's company more than anyone else. Carry on conversations without ever saying a word. Our family thinks mom and dad are telepathic. I guess we're lucky, but these bizarre people will never understand that. There's gigantic hole carved out of their souls by too much money. And it can't be filled with money no matter how much they shovel into it. I might feel sad for them if they weren't so god awfully fucked up.

[Joinfortmill]

43. Love this. It's so lovely and real.

[allegorical oracle]

17. Somewhere in Amazonia there is an office pool taking bets on how long this

ego-fusion lasts.

[fujiyamasan]

19. Good description of both of them

Reminds me of Lex Luther.

When someone mentions his fiance I keep thinking of the inauguration where all the tech CEOs are oogling at her ummm, assets.

[LilyBelle]

21. Why didn't they do it on his rocket?

Get hitched up in the sky if he wants a spectacle.

[Escape]

23. This is America now...

a Monopoly Game gone wrong.

[Iamscrewed]

24. Stupid does stupid stuff

Between the media and our backwards education system what did you expect.

[Grim Chieftain]

25. Those people who pander to Bezos and his "bride"

are rich slime. I dare to say anyone here on DU has more class, integrity and ethics than the whole lot of them.

[FakeNoose]

27. Refresh my memory ... is she one of the women who went up in space a few months ago?

Maybe she caught an alien-herpes virus or something.

[cbabe]

28. We're not the jet set

https://m.

[CoopersDad]

30. Image of the day:

[Bev54]

31. Not the least bit interested in the billionaire spectacle

I find it simply disgusting the way they show off their wealth and privilege and totally disrupt normal peoples lives because they think they are far more important. Probably be divorced in a few years anyway. I refuse to watch any coverage of it, thankfully stopped watching CNN a few years ago.

[Pendrench]

33. I don't care one bit about the Bezos wedding...

but I'm a huge fan of MacKenzie Scott (his first wife) and her philanthropy.

https://yieldgiving.com/

[Bozvotros]

37. Thanks for that link.

She has another fan now.

[gfarber]

35. reading more into it

None of us can. You hit the nail on the head. If you have enough money, you can look as grotesque as you want. Maybe you will attract someone with money.

[Warpy]

36. I haven't watched TV in over 3 years. I don't even have one now

so I didn't know anything abotu this and don't much care except for an idle question about how much younger than he is this wife is., a question that needs no answer.

A very wise socialite once told me the rule for men with multiple marriages: the fir st wife gets the hard work and most of the kids, the second wife pops out one kid and then divorces him, taking all the gravy the first wife worked for, and the third wife gets him.

Worked out like that for my ex except for the kids.

[GenThePerservering]

45. She's 55 years old

He is 61, so at least he's not marrying someone young enough to be his daughter.

ETA (put the rest in the wrong post)

[Warpy]

47. Kudos tp Bezos, then

for not picking some simpering trophy babe.

He already had my grudging respect for the way he dealt with blackmail some years ago.

The wedding is still a circus.

[Jit423]

38. I wonder if the wedding will be a tax write-off?

Some of it will be I am sure.

[Cha]

39. Lol.. what did she n

Need plastic surgery for?

[Intractable]

41. Her surgery-made smile reminds me of the Joker.

[Joinfortmill]

42. She's a freak. His first wife is lovely.

[vanessa_ca]

44. I care! In fact

I'm extremely disappointed and stunned not to be invited as a long time Amazon prime member.

[GenThePerservering]

46. A little goes a long way

Her face shows the effects of too much plastic surgery when one begins aging. She looked great before and would have aged really well, but she's pretty much ruined that as old women with lots of 'work' start looking like Jocelyn Wildenstein, and she has maybe 10 years tops for that work to start falling apart.

And I'm saying this as someone who is never against a little 'refreshing', just that there is a limit.

Bezos just looks like a gnome.

Also "unholy Hallmark Movie Channel wet dream" wins the internets for today.